math...not necessarily a bad subject just suicide. when massie got in to room 4-9 algerbra 2 she went immediately to the front of the classroom.the safest place was closest to the teacher.
there was a call about 20 minutes into the intensiveness of get answers right and coming out alive, massies heart left 10 miles when the loud speaker told the teacher to come down to the office. and as the loudspeaker said Mrs.moukoske left quickly and daintly, and as soon as that happened everyone went out of control. the whores started making out and that made the guys get out and "skip" but it was really to prevent a "happy" feeling thats quite noticable.and jacob took out his weed and started smoking with his friends while melissa was bragging about a guy she said she "slept" with.(lie haha) so, far this was going good hey all massie could think was that she was still in one peice and that was all that mattered right, wrong. melissa appeared over the side of massies desk and massie had no choice but to look up. "hey your the little whore that was staring at me today, the virgin!" and just like that melissa took massie and pulled her fragile body out of her seat. massie yelped whiletring to get away but that only made melissa grab her more feircly and throw her to the wall. by then everyone was gathered around massie and melisse wanting to see the fight and that only presuaded melissa more. she made her admit she was a virgin and then smacked her so hard in the mouth while wearing her "metal hand" (her hand with alot of rings on it) which left a nasty cut on her lips. gushing broken tissue and blood came down massies mouth but she was foursed to ignore it as she was fouribly made to get back up and whispered in her ear "now little virgin this was just wjat i would call a harsh waring if you ever look at me again your in sides will be teared up into little bits and your ugly behind wont be worth enough to be picked up by the janitor let alone anything coming close to a funeral.understand?" "yes" she trembled and with one last smack she was left to die for all they cared.
she foursed herself up and ran out of the classroom.

massie got up to the shrilling scream of the bloody mary commercial on her alarm clock at exactly 6:00 a.m. she groaned with the thought of another Monday and another week of school, but that was before she knew this would be the beginning of the end of her short life.she got ready and on her way out the door her dad offered to drive her and her brother mike to school, she slightly hesitated but excepted knowing it would be ten times better than the bus.
on the way to school her dad tried to make small talk but massie rarely paid attention, before school it was time to prepare for the day not make silly talk with her clueless dad,
once she got to school she and her brother got out and waved goodbye to there dad. mike took his separate ways to fight off the immediate danger of his sister and massie just walked slowly and prayed while looking aimlessly at nothing, then something hit her and she looked up. "oy! what the hell are you looking at virgin!" Melissa the fat wiger bully with corn rows and fat lips and a huge buda belly yelled at her in a threatening voice.massie quickly looked away and loud enough so massie could hear melissa gloated to her group"that ugly virgin looks at me again with her filthy fucking screwed up face i'll fucking bash my foot up her ass so far it'll come through her virgin head!"
massie was shaking on the inside she didnt know what would happen next. math, people in her math class..... jacob and melissa.....shoot this isnt going to be pretty.

finally the weekend.It wasn't a great time but it was better than school.when massie woke up she immediately put on some makeup to try to hide some of her cuts. the last thing she needed was to spend her weekend with questioning.she could smell bacon and eggs yum... she pulled on a big t-shirt and some old jeans with that faded to an ugly brown from the grass last summer when they went to grandma's in Washington. man she loved that summer. all she and her brother did was play outside all the time with the neighborhood kids.that was when everything seemed to make since.before high school, when everything got confusing and nothing had a reason.those wonderful memories were the ones she tried to keep out of her mind because she knew nothing would be that way again.
massie went downstairs and sat down, her brother smiled at her and took a piece of her bacon. just like him to pretend like we were the closest ever.he doesn't notice my existence at school why should it be the same at home.she rolled her eyes and whispered under her breath "bipolar".
after breakfast her father thought it was a great idea to go to the neighborhood park and play football with her brother and her, she said no but he always seems to get people were he wants them before they can even refuse i guess some people would say that's a good quality but massie just thought it was a death wish. as soon as they got there massies heart jumped with the forgotten possibility that somebody from school would be there. she looked around with her dark empty eyes and let out a deep sigh when she saw the park deserted.
when the family settled down and stared playing around with the football massie acually let loose and did what she thought was impossible after 9th grade, she had fun. although there was some uncomfortable moments like when the football hit her in freshly bruised places and when her brother tried to get the ball from her by "tickling" her on her ribs and she let out a shrill scream but other than that it was kind of a good time.until an unwanted person came to the park and her heart stopped.
it was jacob, the school gangster and her #1 harraser.she wanted todrown in a bunny hole right then and there. she had no idea what to expect from him and she really didnt want to know.when her brother looked over at her sister and saw her scared look he loooked around concerned, he wanted to know what she felt so threatened about, then he him,jacob and mike automaticly knew and told hid dad he didnt feel good. so massie was saved and it was all because of her brother.she got out. hopefully before he saw her and she was grateful for this unexpected kind of day.

at lunch massie walked straight to the bathroom. she never went to the cafeteria that would be suicide. just another excuse for people to pick on her.no way.she went into a stall and sat on the toilet seat.she took out her apple and started to munch on it but it hurt her teeth to much from the previous smack in the mouth this morning, so she threw it in the toilet.then she heard somebody come in. her heart jumped and she tried not to breath loud.but i guess she wasn't quiet enough because somebody banged on the bathroom door and she squealed. than she saw a hairy hand go under the bathroom stall. shit, it was a man. she stepped on it , not thinking because she was stuck and that would just make it worse.he moaned with pain.than banged the door so hard it slammed open.then he charged.she tried to scream but it was to late. he had her...and she was defenceless. he took her and raped her right there.it only lasted a couple minutes but the whole time it ripped massie apart but she held herself back from crying.when it was over he threatened her and she had to promise not to say anything, then he lefted as if nothing had happened and she was fourced to do the same thing even know on the inside she was breaking down in tears.

massie pulled her head up above her pillow. the cuts on her ribs hurt from the day before. some from other people some she gave herself.she went in the bathroom and took a shower. when she got out she looked at the clock and without any emotion she hurried out the door and got on the bus not stopping for a second because she never wanted to worry her parents with the cuts and bruises all over her body, but she had nothing to worry about anyway. none of her family even noticed her there. her dad didnt look up from his paper and her mom was talking on the phone as usual with her thick jersey accent.she got on the bus with her head down and her blonde hair in her skinny face. her pale white body didnt compliment her school uniform a plaid green and black skirt with a white blouse and black sweater. and she couldnt help but limp, her boney white legs had veins popping out and all you could see on them were scars and freshly new bruises. she went through the isle searching for a seat when suddently she got tripped and yanked into a seat with a man who obviously had bad intensions. after the bus started leaving he started touching her and when she yelped she got slapped across the face. when the school bus finally stopped, she got off with a blank look and prepared for the worst.
as she walked in the hallway people spit at her and called her a whore and threatened to kill her if she gave one glimps to them. she tried to ignore this and holding her books close to her she looked to the ground.when she got to class she didnt feel any safer.anything could happen here and nobody gave a damn all she could think was after high school everything has to be better. if she even lived until then.

september 25,1995

school. Lincon high school was the worst thing that ever happened to massie.it was where everything happened in her life and without the things that happened there maybe she would still be here right now. she was hassled and beat up everyday, for no reason at all.But, the weird thing is, you never saw a tear. not one. this is massie's story, for no one can judge without knowing ones story.